My English professor at the University of Toronto. Mr. Steven Jay Page. Professor Page that is! He has to be one of the sweetest people I know! Out of his hundreds of students that he sees everyday, it’s hard to realize that he can keep sane!
Today, I’m sitting in the front row. We are supposed to be reading our literature books and taking notes on what we’ve read. There are other people of course, who would rather talk, listen to their portable CD players, or chew their gum insanely loud. But that doesn’t bother Professor Page, he just sits there at his desk tapping his pen on his papers and he looks over our Vocab tests that we had taken a few days before.
The bell rings, I pick up my book and my papers and put them into my bag as I head out the door to a hallway filled with hundreds of University students. I see my best friend, Lila as I’m walking towards the parking lot.
“Lila!” I run over and give her a big hug. “Need a ride home?” I ask next.
That’s the same question I ask her every single day. She has a car, but for some apparent reason, she never drives it to school. So, she usually depends on me for a ride home, and her parents on a ride to school. We get into the car.
“Want to get a bite to eat?” I ask.
“Sure!” she replies.
There was a long awkward silence.
“So how were classes today?” I ask out of boredom.
“Professor Robertson touched me today!” she shrieked excitedly.
Professor Robertson was the schools Chemistry Lab teacher. I had him twice a week. Lila had him everyday. Sometimes I think she only took his class so that she could drool over him for an hour and a half everyday!
“Oh my God, Jane,” she continues. “He looked so amazingly sexy in that white lab coat!”
I snickered. “He wears the same white lab coat everyday, Lila!”
She looks at me and smiles. “So how was Professor Page today? Wink wink!”
I looked at her and stuck out my tongue. “I don’t like Professor Page like that!” I laughed. “Is Professor Robertson married?”
Lila gasped and put her hand over her mouth. “I don’t know!” she exclaimed. “I hope not!”
The rest of the ride down, all Lila did was drool over Professor Robertson!
She really gets annoying, but I’m too much of a pussy to tell her. We pulled
into McDonalds parking lot. All of a sudden, Lila starts shouting frantically.
“JANE! PROFESSORS PAGE AND ROBERTSON ARE HERE!” I slam on my brakes. She
almost gave me a heart attack.
“How did they beat us here from school?” I ask.
Lila obviously didn’t care. When the two professors got out of their car, so did we. I guess they saw us, because they came over to my car.
“Lila! Jane! Hi girls!” Professor Robertson shouted. “Awkward how we both got here at the same time!” he said with a grin.
Yeah, I know this sounds really stupid but I got this sudden feeling. What is Page and Robertson were stalking me? NAH! They wouldn’t do that! Or would they?
“Want to go inside and get something to eat?” asked Professor Page next.
Before I could even speak, Lila was practically jumping into Robertson’s lap. “YES!” she shouted. “I’d love to go get something to eat! That’s what we’re here for, isn’t it?”
I guess I had an “oh my god I don’t want to be here” look on my face because Page asked me what was wrong!
“Nothing.” I replied. What I really wanted to say though, is “I don’t feel comfortable going out to eat with my teachers, even if it is just McDonalds!”
I could see Lila was freaking out. She kept looking over at Robertson and then looking and at and smiling. I hope he didn’t notice this, because Lila was making a complete ass out of herself. Did she honestly think that Professor Robertson wanted her? HA! I had a feeling he did know though, because she couldn’t be more blunt about it!
So me, Lila, Page, and Robertson all went inside and ordered our food. Separately of course. No way in hell I would let my teachers pay for my food. I ordered a combo number five like I always do. Chicken nuggets, fries, and a diet coke. Lila got the meal that comes with a cheeseburger, and Professors Page and Robertson both got salads. Go figure.
After ordering, we all went and sat down in a booth near the window. Lila and I sat next to each other. I was across from Page, and she was across from Robertson. Obviously she wanted it that way. I know she had everything all planned out! That’s Lila for ya!
“So you’re coming to my house after school tomorrow right, Jane?” asked Professor Page. I almost jumped out of my seat. I had to think about that for a minute. Why the hell would I be going to his house after school? That’s when I remembered that I’m in his poetry club. Me, and about three or four other people met at his house about three times a month. He would put out some chips and dip, and we would sit around the living room and read poems we had written. I always enjoyed the meetings.
I smiled at him. “Of course I’m going! I never miss those!” I said shoving a chicken nugget down my throat. I felt comfortable around Professor Page. I even felt comfortable calling him Steve every once in awhile. Actually, I think he preferred that better.
While “Steve” and I went on talking about poetry club, I overheard Lila and Robertson talking about the lab they did in Chem. It involved cow and pig hearts.
Steve looked over at him and said, “Ed! Stop discussing that, we’re all trying to eat here!”
I could tell that “Steve” and “Ed” had been friends for quite some time. They were always together! Lila and I had been friends since about fourteen or so, and now we were both twenty. To try and make conversation, I asked the two teachers how long they had been friends.
“Oh, since about fourteen!” “Ed” replied.
We went on discussing useless topics of interest for about the next twenty minutes. But I guess I’m the one who ruined everything. But I had to leave in order to get to work on time. I thanked my Professors for a nice afternoon then I drove Lila home. I was relieved when she finally got out of the car because the whole ride home, she talked about nothing other than Professor Robertson. She even started referring to him as plain old Ed. Not that it matters or anything, but it just sounds weird like that.
As soon as I got home, I went straight to bed. I was actually surprised that Lila didn’t call me and start going off about “Ed.”
The next morning when I woke up, I got dressed. I decided to wear a new dress I had gotten a few days earlier at the mall. It was short and black and zipped all the way up the front. A very sexy dress that I thought may impress Professor Page.
I grabbed my poetry book, remembering the meeting I had at his house after school.
When I got to school, I had Health class. The teacher there was Kevin. Kevin Hearn. Mr. Hearn as he liked to be referred to. He had beaten cancer a few years earlier, so that was usually all he ever talked about, which you know, after hearing about 700 times in a row, gets kinda sickening.
Next was English. I don’t know if I was looking forward to seeing Page or not. I was the first one in the room.
“Jane!” He looked over at me and smiled. I smiled back.
“I had fun yesterday afternoon! How about you?” he asked.
Ahhh… I was screaming inside. I don’t know, but something inside of me at that moment told me “God, I want to jump Steve’s junk RIGHT NOW!” The way he looks at you when he’s happy, you just want to melt into a big puddle of nothing.
As soon as class started and Page had started going over our tests, I was doing some major planning in my head. Tonight at his house, after everyone leaves, I was going to stay late for some “extra help.” Professor Page was definitely gonna get some!